True, isn’t it? Wouldn’t we all like to know that? It starts early, especially for some little girls. But it never really changes, we want to know what the men in our lives are thinking. All too often, they aren’t necessarily spilling the beans.
So for today’s Husband Project, I’m supposed to keep my hubby on my mind. Whether that’s doing something for him, praying for him, or just focusing on the positives. I did that by finishing a couple books I’ve had on my shelf and have been wanting to read. Today I made it a priority.
What’s He Really Thinking
This book immediately gave me insight and a new way of looking at what’s really going on inside the head of my husband. From the different things that drive them to the vast difference in what they need. Specifically, the author begins by talking about men’s work. It’s not random placement that this gets top billing at the front of the book… it’s a priority and often defines how men feel about themselves. This is particularly apropos in our current economic landscape with so many men who were family breadwinners now being laid off and feeling stuck at home.
A poignant quote in another section was this, “Lurking beneath every conversation you have with a man is this theme of adequacy. Is he enough of a man—for this job, these children, this whatever?” I see glimpses of this already with my son who desperately wants to know that he has done well, whether it’s building a tower, flying a plane, or saying his prayers before dinner. He’ll often ask for that affirmation with something like, “That was a good one, wasn’t it?” Men aren’t quite so obvious, but I bet if you start listening, you’ll hear that need for affirmation as well.
Bottom line, What’s He Really Thinking?
Your Intercultural Marriage
This is one targeted book. If you’re not in an intercultural marriage, it probably won’t apply… unless you’ve got friends or family members who could benefit. But I love that there is a book for couples like us! And there are more and more every day it seems. I love that because to me it’s a sign that cultural and racial barriers may be breaking down, slowly but surely.
The interesting thing for me in reading this book is that I realized my husband and I are not really that different culturally. We’re more different in personality and preferences than culture… and we’ve already been married over 7 years so many of the strategies and suggestions in the book about engagement and early marriage would’ve helped a few years ago.
I think this book would be perfect for a dating couple, in order to give them food for thought as they develop and nurture their relationship. As it was, my favorite part of Your Intercultural Marriage
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