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DAY 2: 30 DAYS TO A NO-REGRETS LIFE

And we’re off! Here’s your Day Two questions to ponder and answer‚

  1. Answer this: If you were certain your life would end in 30 days, what would be your biggest regret? Why?
  2. Analyze this: What area of your life are you suffering from Someday Syndrome? (SS=one day, when, if only)
  3. Realize this: Today IS your Someday!
  4. Choose this: What metaphor would describe your life if you were fully awake and engaged?
  5. Find this: Find a symbol to represent your metaphor and post it somewhere to remind you.
SURPRISING ANSWER 
If I knew I only had a few weeks to live, my biggest regret would be wasting so much time feeling rejected, unloved, and unwanted. Whoa! Where did that come from? What a shocker when I found myself writing those words. But when I think about it, it’s painfully true. What’s your answer?
SOMEDAY SYNDROME
I suffer from Someday Syndrome regarding time‚Äîtime to exercise, hang out with kids, not work all the time, an do more creative hobbies and pursue outside interests. Someday I’ll run a marathon. Someday I’ll work only 6 hours a day. Someday I’ll take the entire summer off to play with my kids. Someday I’ll get back in the gym. Someday I’ll finish all my photo albums. And the list goes on. Living for someday gets really tiring doesn’t it…so much misdirected energy, so little action.
6a00d83451bb0b69e20120a51d2d5d970c 250wi DAY 2: 30 DAYS TO A NO REGRETS LIFE METAPHOR FOR LIFE
Triathlon. That was easy. When I was doing my first triathlon, this is how I felt:
  • so proud of myself
  • just focused on finishing
  • enjoying the ride
  • not concerned about being passed
  • encouraging others along the way

That would be a fantastic way to live every day wouldn’t it? Alrighty, that’s my take on Day Two. Time for you to share your thoughts with me!

As a special treat, I’m sharing a male point of view on this…my husband’s. It seriously inspired me! Keep reading to see and watch what his amazing metaphor for living a fully engaged life would be…

As a visual representation or metaphor for how I want to envision my life during the One Month to Live challenge, I choose the Fellowship of the Ring‚ÄîJRR’s Tolkien’s fantasy about a small Hobbit, Frodo, tasked with destroying the “One” ring, and the 8 companions who strode off with him. What I love about the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy is that the Fellowship’s journey is such a fantastic representation of life, and what’s possible when you have incredible faith. Hobbits are the smallest, most peaceful and least battle-trained denizens of Middle Earth. Yet, it was one of these smallest creatures, Frodo, charged with destroying the most evil item in the land, Lord Sauron’s “Master Ring.” Like David was to Goliath, Frodo was to Sauron.

The fellowship’s journey was much like life in that there was extreme joy, and extreme pain. Excitement and fear. Compassion and betrayal. At one point, Frodo, tired from the quest, has a chat with the wizard Gandalf and says he wishes none of these things came upon him, that he wasn’t given this burden to bear. Gandalf, in his wisdom, counsels Frodo that we cannot control the things in life that befall us, we can only control what we decide to do with the time that is given to us.

In that same speech, Frodo laments that his uncle Bilbo never killed the evil creature Gollum when he had the chance (Gollum is following the fellowship in hopes of retrieving the One Ring). Gandolf asks Frodo who is he to determine who lives and who dies. The pity that Bilbo showed Gollum may play some larger role they cannot yet see. (In fact, it does when Gollum himself becomes the key reason the ring eventually is destroyed). Again, this terrific story reminds us that we cannot see the future, we cannot control who lives or dies, including ourselves. And that there is a bigger force at work.

So, I want to live life like I’m on a grand adventure: knowing there will be good times and bad ahead. Knowing that I’ll face challenges and do things I never thought I could do. And knowing that I have a purpose. A purpose that is bigger than even I can comprehend, but not too big for the God I love to get me there.

11 Comments August 3, 2009
  • http://profile.typepad.com/knitandpurlgrrl knitandpurlgrrl

    My biggest regret would be thinking that where I am is not as good as where I could be.
    I’d like to find a “YOU ARE HERE” sign to remind me that real life is happening RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE.
    Love this!
    xoxo
    Lain

  • http://www.hisheartmydesire.blogspot.com Beverly

    Love your blog. Very inspiring. I will be back for the daily encouragement on One Month to Live. Thanks so much!

  • http://profile.typepad.com/realwomenscrap Tasra Dawson

    I like that, a big ole sign to remind us to pay attention and open our eyes to where we are instead of always looking for someplace bigger, better, and brighter.
    Thanks for sharing! I can definitely relate. :-)
    Tasra

  • http://profile.typepad.com/realwomenscrap Tasra Dawson

    Hi Beverly,
    Thanks for you kind words on the blog. It’s my home away from home. :-) Settle in and stay for a while, we’re so glad to have you here for the daily encouragement.
    Tasra

  • http://www.1000-words.com/blog Alana

    I think the metaphor for my life is a roller coaster — lots of ups and some downs, often I have butterflies in my stomach and occasionally I can be scared about what’s up ahead, but overall, it’s quite a ride! I need to throw my arms up — let go of everything that holding me back — and enjoy it!

  • http://profile.typepad.com/realwomenscrap Tasra Dawson

    Alana, I love how you say you need to just throw your arms up and let go of everything holding you back! I’ts perfect!

  • http://TottenLifeSong.blogspot.com Kimberlyn

    I absolutely love this, I am jumping on board a little late and am going to spend some time catching up. I may not post my thoughts here, but I just wanted you to know that I am out here and that I appriciate your words and encouragment to live life “ALIVE and FULLY AWAKE” Thank you for also sharing your husbands thoughts. So good!

  • http://profile.typepad.com/realwomenscrap Tasra Dawson

    Hi Kimberlyn!
    Thanks for letting us know you’re “out there.” Come back to visit whenever you need encouragement. We’ll be here. :-)

  • http://caliianphoenix.wordpress.com Staci

    Biggest Regret:
    My biggest regret would be that I always seem to be second guessing myself. How many times have I failed to seize an oppurtunity because I let my dual brained nature rationalize the possibilities? How many negative or painful consequences could I have avoided? How many lost moments with my older children who are now adults.
    http://caliphoenix.wordpress.com/2009/08/08/day-two-internal-critic/

  • http://profile.typepad.com/realwomenscrap Tasra Dawson

    Staci! Thank you so much for your honesty on this comment. I pray that you
    won’t let doubt keep you from pressing forward in the things that mean the
    most to you. It sounds like you’ve got a good idea of what you want to do…
    not it’s just about taking action and risk!
    You can do it. :-)

  • Trinity

    1. Answer this: If you were certain your life would end in 30 days, what would be your biggest regret? Why?

    If I knew 30 days from now would herald my end of days I would regret having spent the last few years living “within my emotional and psychological means.” Remember the belief that you were destined for greatness? I, too, held that belief. Yet the years since my mother's death have left me in a holding pattern. I've stopped pushing. I've stopped yearning. And, worst of all, I've stopped dreaming. This has had a profound impact on my person and my purpose. I've felt “my person”, (y'know, the real one inside, behind the fake smiles, “how are you doings”, and “fabulous, thank you” lines), shrink – - no, shrivel – - almost to the point that I wonder if she's there at all. Can I pour the life force on and rehydrate this amazing girl inside? Can I let go of the emotional “control tower”, and fly free from the holding pattern? I know I can. And, I will. I am amazing, powerful, and strong beyond measure. I am inspired and I am inspiration. Which brings me to my purpose. Like it or not, we've all been called to a purpose that is beyond that which we “do” everyday. And, being born of a Greenfield, my purpose is in connecting, healing, nurturing, and inspiring every person my soul comes in contact with. Most importantly, those gifts begin at home with my husband and my son. Where I've been has not allowed me to give them – or you – or me – my all. Truthfully, this holding pattern has not only left me stagnant, but sucked the life right out of my soul. My eyes don't sparkle quite as bright. My smile's not as warm and wide. My heart has doors, and gates, and locks. My soul…well, it sings in shades of gray. That is not me. That is not who I am. That defies my purpose. And so today, I will continue to unlock the locks, open the gates, and kick down the doors. I'm coming back to get you girl. I'm pulling you back out into the light. You were CALLED to a purpose and for a life that is greater than you know. Get to it!

    2. Analyze this: What area of your life are you suffering from Someday Syndrome? (SS=one day, when, if only)

    OK – seriously – ONE DAY I am going to write a book. This book will be a tribute to my life, my sister's life, my mother's life, and the lives of all of the people that I have met growing up. Those of you who know me understand that this will be one hell of a book…someday.

    3. Realize this: Today IS your Someday! – - OK, Chapter One…

    4. Choose this: What metaphor would describe your life if you were fully awake and engaged? So, while not sure it's a metaphor, the word that keeps coming to me is “LifeSource”. In my heart this means several things. 1st, it would mean that I am wholly connected to my LifeSource, almost like a constant blood transfusion, feeding my own spirit, charging my soul, and supplying me with energy. I then see that LifeSource spreading through me and energizing me to do amazing things every day. To live life fully alive – soaking up every delicious drop of life – creating a buzz of excitement in me, my family, my friends, my acquaintances – venturing into new opportunities and challenges, and not letting anything slip through my fingers – being positive – establishing vision and making it reality. And third, I see LifeSource coming through me and touching every person I come in contact with. Through this joy would be spread, healing would happen, hearts would be inspired, wisdom would be shared, relationships would be formed. LifeSource is being plugged into my Source for life, living that life, and sharing that life with others.

    5. Find this: Find a symbol to represent your metaphor and post it somewhere to remind you.

    So, although it is a symbol for something else, I am using the symbol for infinity. (No, not just cuz all the boys used to say Trinity for Infinity.) The reason is that this symbol shows that ultimate connection to God, myself, others, and back to God. It reminds me that my action, or lack of action, impacts me, my family, my friends, my purpose, and all those I've not yet met. It tells me that I am not doing this on my own. It shows me that there is not a beginning and there is not an end, but there are only infinite possibilities to be experience on this journey.